Aunty MIA ??

I have been MIA because
I have been
a) f**king lazy
b) minding other ppl's biz but my own
c) Uncle hijacked my computer as his was being repaired
d) Korean soaps have kidnapped my brains

e) I am not talking to myself as much as before so the Schizo medication must be working
f) I have been waiting on tether hooks for a supposed roofing leak repair expert to show up in vain
g) All of the above

I HATE to tell you that the answer is (g) when I coulda just LIED & said I was out doing a lotta charity work & saving the world while working on my hot bod.

The only part of my bod that's being worked on is the beard on my upper lip & the bushy brow I am attempting to sculpt into that of a seductress.

Which is another story. So let's just stick to that.

And yesterday I had a chuckle.
Read a double page ad placed by Petronas of errant scholarship students who had not repaid their loans. I couldn't believe my eyes that out of 121 names (or 112?) listed, 24 had no IC numbers to their names but Passport numbers.

Eh? How does that happen? I thought only Malaysians get those scholarships, and then ALWAYS as part of any application, one's supposed to state an IC number?

I mean my experience here as a law abiding citizen is that we must at the very least submit a copy of our IC together with gazillion pieces of paper to prove we are who we say we are.

Macam ni, no wonder I aint rushing to buy any Msian GIC stocks.

Who the shithead was it who granted those loans to ppl without IC?
Don't tell me those are foreigners? Can't be since the passport numbers are like yours & mine; ie starts with an "A". Mind you some even appeared without an "A" and one with just a coupla numbers as ID.

Let me just count the potential $$ down the toilet of those unrecoverable scholarship loans granted to ppl without IC.

24 x rgt30,000 = Rgt720,000 or Euro 144,000.

OK. That's like a drop in the Petronas ocean or in the KL city council budget.

I mean what's that compared to the dumbass florist bill of Rgt32.4 million (thirty two million??) for 3 years supply of flowers recently cancelled by KL City mayor that was highlighted here
http://www.sun2surf.com/article.cfm?id=40115

Oh. Have I (like our policians) said "we are world class" yet?
We sure are "world class in anything we do, especially when it comes to throwing money down the toilet

The new MCA lineup

I am chuffed to learn that some folks took to heart that salted fish should not be resuscitated.

And by the way, my photo came from Niamah (Patrick Teo)'s posting of a new comedy show prophetically named MACC, premiering Oct 17. About a bunch of chinamen politicans & their party I bet!

Now I dunno if Pat Teoh is psychic-aler than Aunty here or maybe because he has better guppies at crystal balling than my dead ones? But WOWZA..how accurate & timely can you get man?!

Now. What does the no-confidence vote in Ong's leadership portends for us ordinary folks?

And what does the restore-membership-to HumsupChua but deny him his VP-ness mean?

Speaking from my (well-fed/watered) gut I feel today's fiasco shows the real deep rifts & frustrations in the Malaysian Chinese Association about their political direction.

No shit!? Did I not tell you I am psychic?

AND it shows it is about brudy time that Malaysia should stop having only Chinese or Indian or any race centric parties anymore.

Am I bothered that MCA have no heads or that MIC is split about 3-ways down the middle? Do I sound bothered?

Had there been no other alternative parties, then maybe I am gonna think "AIYOH! Who is gonna speak up for me anymore?"

But this ain't 1960 and its been a damn long time since MCA has been speaking up for anyone other than themselves.

In fact, if they had fallen into a hole, I couldn't be bothered. And I don't think I am alone. Look at the last elections & the whoppin' they got.

If they are still deluding themselves into thinking that they are representing the Chinese here, I've got news for all dem boys & gals in MCA.

Honey. Just drive your Benzes, & live in your Mcmansions & leave us folks alone!

Resuscitating the Salted Fish

Gawd knows why October always turns out to be so eventful.

If not for the dreaded historical black October (stock market), then this October saw all those recent devastating disasters, & now here in Bolehland, the deluge of critical decisions to be made this weekend. And we are only into the 2rd week of October!

This weekend is particularly exciting for me. It looks like the by-election in Bagan Pinang & the 2 EGMs may be a case of resuscitating a salted fish. As we all know, before we salt dem fish, they are dead as dead can be. So resuscitating them is a tall order.

But all I am asking for is that the salted fish stay nice & salted before I goreng it to eat with my porridge.

And really. Is it worth bringing back the dead in most cases?

Whether its Bagan Pinang's by-election or the EGM for MCA & my alumni.

On BP, my bet is not on the ISAlted fish. Reason: People ain't as duh as we look that we don't know by now, that infrastructure & donations only magically appear within a few weeks of an election.

As for MCA, again my nyet is on Chua (another Salted fish)

I can't for the life of me see how anyone can defend a serial adulterer (yes yes Chua's very efficient but then so was Bill) in leading a community.

Chua's stalwart defenders & he - for that matter - do not seem to mind alienating the votes (already precious few) of us Aunties.

I hate to remind you Dear Dr Chua, how much power us Aunties have in this world.

We may not shout that out (unlike some wives of VVIPs) but in our own way, we ARE the hand rocking the cradle, dear!

As for my alumni's EGM. Another case of some salted fish trying to come back for some quarters.

Too many poor decisions, & a certain lack of accountabilty made for stupid politiking.

I just don't know why salted fish can't just stay salted. Don't they know there's no other way for them to come back to life?

Is ASTRO having Malaysians on?

A small beep in the ocean to speak out against programming on Astro, our not-cheap-monopoly satelite tv in Bolehland.

I used to watch satelite or cable from Singapore, then Australia & finally South Africa REGULARLY.

As some of you know, this was as recent as March this year.

Since I have returned to KL full time, I have NOT bothered to watch Astro regularly. I only did so recently because my guppies unfortunately did not survive my crystal ball reading exercise, & because I am a little tired of a diet of only Korean soaps.

But it looks like Astro is recycling everything I used to watch from years ago. This is like "twilight zone" to me because some programs are way, WAY old!

My latest example is NBC's "The Biggest Loser" that's now on, which is from the 2006 release. That is on Primetime (ie 7 to 10pm ok?). The winner lost weight & put back weight awreddy leh!

OK. You are saying "Aunty that is caused by time diff between Malaysia & India etc"

NO NO & NO!

I catch programs as my life evolves; ie anywhere from 10am - 3am! All the programs are in a loop lah! I watch BBCE, AXN etc. So I KNOW.

Programs I have watched in under-developed countries are too new to be seen here. What a paradox!

Ofcourse you are saying, "Aunty. You get what you pay".

Ok. I take that. But did you know that in the equivalent currency (ie you use US$1 in USA the same as you use S$1 in Singapore as you use Rgt1 in M'sia etc) - I am paying the "same" rate?

No wonder some people think we are backwards.

The programs we watch are old & recycled.

The politicians we have are old & recycled.

The rhetorics? SHEESH!

I can't help but wonder why ONLY in Bolehland it is that we keep hearing the words "world class" in everything we do.

If Astro TV is an example of our "world class"-ness, then we are indeed the proverbial "katak dibawa tempurung" or "frog in a well"

And if we keep voting back in all the kataks?

Well! I guess we just deserve our tempurung ain't it?

Do what I say but not as I do

I know I know.

For all of us responsible elders & seniors of our families & societies - trying to teach good values, morals & judgements to our next generation, the "Do what I say & as I Do" bit is always a tough call.

As time goes by, (with me it takes no time at all) this call becomes "Do what I say & NOT as I do" It just ain't natural to not be yourself for too long.

Take a certain VVIP yesterday speaking to his party faithfuls at the Bagan Pinang by elections for instance.

He was warning ppl against using race politics.

I agree with him.

We, the average Aunties & Uncles of this world don't like race, color, gender or religion politics.

In extensive chatting over many cups of kopi-o, I know us average Paks & Maks are MUCH more tolerant, and peace loving than any politician out there.

To top it off.

COWABUNGA Politics!

This is the same guy who didn't walk his own talk...in a really memorable, memorialized speech - in order (sez he) to preserve his identity (which is part Arab) whilst waving something really pointy & sharp.

I was googling the word "waving the keris" & the search popped out over 32,000 references to it & all towards that one VVIP.

Moral of the Story: Don't Preach Bro, when you can't follow your own Sermons