Friday, 28 August 2009

No Questioning Allowed: Citizenship in Malaysia

Aunties just ain't savvy. That's a fact. When we talk, it's about food, illnesses & diseases, children or baking & line dancing. Sometimes we add in herbal supplements as a side topic.

And some of the other times (RARE!) we find ourselves talking about what we read. That's when we either hush up or shut up.

I dunno what we think can happen to us if the table next to us full of more aunties & uncles can hear us

But I think, silently, lurking beneath us is the dread (or threat?) of thinking that, at any time our status of living in this country can be taken away for saying something wrong.

Nay. Not just talking, but even THINKING about something is wrong.

52 years of independence & we are still thinking this way & some are still behaving that way.

Go figure how many more years of independence we will need before we can be open.

So, this morning, after slurping down her noodles, Aunty Lucy suddenly said, "Eh. Why only 10% non-Malays got called up for citizenship interviews ah? I didn't know Malays also needed an interview to get papers? I thought they sure auto get citizenship? "

The silence was deafening, even in our crowded kopi shop.

We know what she's saying.
We know how it is.

Several of us have families or know of Malaysian ladies who are married to well qualified & educated foreigners who are not allowed to live here long term nor earn a living in their specialised field - much as they would love to.

The only way foreign men can get to live here is to get a 1 yr visa (on a spouse dependency pass), set up their own company. Or starting from this year, EVEN get the Malaysia My 2rd Home Visa.

OK. They can also try their luck by being hired by an employer who's willing to jump through hoops to get them a job visa.

Those with foreign wives seems to have an "easier" time (ie they get 5 yrs visa).

I dunno why there's this double standard. Must be in the old days, Malaysian women were indeed naive. That policy then was to "protect"our maidens from unscrupulous foreign men taking advantage of them.

The double tragedy is even NOW, the same Malaysian women are subject to prejudice in their husband's country because THAT country thinks they've probably married their countrymen for their citizenship papers too!

Aiyoh. I should know. I am one such person.
(In reality we see more dungu-fied Malaysian men taken in by foreign women, but that's another story)

Now the problem with telling Aunties "Not to.." is like telling them to do something.

Tell them go East, they go West.
Tell them cook fish, they cook chicken.

"Lucy! Change subject! We have been warned NOT to question this by the Ministry" (I think should be Home Minister)

I don't want Lucy to think this is yet another case of Arrogance from our Government but I KNOW - so long as the Home Minister tells us what to do, we should do so.

After all none of us at the table want to balik ke-India or Cina - the word balik being an oxymoron here as none of us have ever lived in, nor was born in those countries.

Aunty L pipes up 1 last time before we can aiyoh her away.
"But we all know what! Malay foreigners also don't need to go for interview will automatically get papers what!"

Sheesh. What DO we do with Aunty Lucy? Short of gagging her at tomorrow's breakfast.

Thursday, 27 August 2009

Aunty's Totally unProfound Thoughts for this week

I have told y'all I am subscribing to both NST & Star for the sole purpose of giving me something to do with that cup of kopi in the morning. Oh yes. I am just like a Nescafe commercial in the morning. Sans the nice hair, the sexy nightie, the gleaming teeth, make-up, bra etc.
Lately I've been thinking it's my imagination but I have been finding that the Straits Times is more objective than The Star in its reporting.

Yeah. Coincidentally (not that it's timed that way) my sub started since Nuraina Samad took over as Managing Editor. Yes. I like her. She's a good good person but that's not why I say NST is better.

The one-sided reporting from the Star makes me think - for all we know - that they may actually be paid by taxpayers (if you get my drift). Or the publishing license is being reviewed.

The reporting goes like this: Opposition speaks? WHAM!!! Opposition won? BOOOFF!! Opposition takes up an issue? BOOFF BOOOFF BOOO..OOOFF!!!

Gomen Speaks? Wonderful! Gush!
Gomen Acts? Gush, gush, gus, Gush, gush, gush,Gush, gush, gush!

Sorry. That was the sound of my retching.

Other Headlines:
Chua Soi Lek, Chua Soi Lek, Chua Soi Lek. Sacked from MCA. I am personally sorry to see him go off into the sunset. Us Aunties at the market will have one less person on whom we take pot shots.

I dunno if we (not just me hah? Many of my friends too!) should feel vindicated or just smug. We'll take smug.

We have been saying & saying & saying that he should not be considered for any position of leadership after his xxxacts were exposed BECAUSE he is a Leader of the Malaysian Chinese.

Ok. So they entrapped him by taping. So What?. He himself "rose" to the occasion didn't he? For 12 years or so by his own reckoning.

Ah Lek, Ah Lek, Ah Lek. Please lah. Either retire or practise being a doctor again. Why get your face all torn up again?

PKFZ. That one AIYOH! Tragedy for the Rakyat man! I am not so renowned for my Maths, so please excuse my Auntynomics for a minute here.

Who issued the bonds for financing this project hah? Yes. Right.
(I am about to use the word "we" very loosely here now)

We are told we can "save" interest payment" by the hundreds of millions if we can pay up for the bonds issued. Which has been err....err....not so well accounted for?

Who supervised & ensured that this project is viable, feasible & accountable? "Not I" said the dog. "Not I" said the Cow - which still leaves us f**king the rubber ducky right?

Win the case? Die. Lose the case? Die.
Life here is indeed Far FAR from boring!


Note: This is not my piece but it was such an interesting piece, I am sharing it with you. Everything below to the very end has not been altered
"I looked out the window.And I saw.
Thousands and thousands of Malays in the Bersih Rally.

They were fighting their own kind for a cause they believed in. And they risk being ostracized by their Muslim brothers. And they risk much.

I looked out the window.And I saw.
Thousands and thousands of Indians holding the picture of Gandhi in the streets. All were teargassed and many beaten with batons. At Batu Caves , they were locked in, pumped with tear gas and sprayed with chemical water. 80 are awaiting trial. 31 are charged for attempted murder of a policeman that attacked them. All their leaders are under ISA. The one that got away fled the country.

I looked out the window.And I saw.
Thousands and thousands of Chinese closing their doors. Minding their own business. Watching the soap operas. Playing mahjong. Going to the gym. Planning for holidays. Eating bah kuet teh. Enrolling their children in private schools. Going for line dancing. Changing to a bigger car. Perming their hair brown. Going to the movies. Shopping.

The Chinese. They don’t look out the window.
Their houses. Have no windows.

It is because of 3 generations of ‘keeping quiet’ that we are in a political quagmire of sorts today.

My story may not be the same for others, but it is no doubt a story of 3 generations of political oblivion -a saga of unremitting circumstances that has ‘trained’ us to look the other way – to economic wealth, education and religion. Politics became a ‘dirty word’ in our home; being Chinese we should disengage ourselves completely from this ‘unproductive’ activity.
This is my story.
My grandfather took a ship to join the gold rush in San Francisco around the turn of the last century.

Halfway on a Chinese junk, he got sea-sick, so he jumped ship at Singapore. Traveling up the hinterland, he focused on survival. Hungry from famine in Southern China , he vowed never to be hungry again. Politics was the last thing on his mind. Keeping his belly filled was his only priority. It was an obsession that dictated everything he did.

My father worked for the British. One day, forced by the Japanese to do ‘national service’, he was selected to look after food supplies. The family was starving during the war, so he stole rice under his care and hid them in sweet potatoes when he cooked rice. Our neighbors always thought we were eating sweet potatoes we grew on the fringes of the jungle, when in actual fact, we always had rice. (ofcourse, we know now it is more nutritious to eat sweet potatoes than rice. Sweet potatoes, the red variety, has carotenes-vitamin A precursors-other nutrients & fibre. Polished rice has mainly carbohydrate)

My grandmother sewed clothes for the women day and night to survive and got paid in Japanese currency. When the war was over, these Japanese notes – which were unnumbered – became valueless. The family again struggled to bring food on the table. It was a litany of hunger and fear in our house.
When it came to my generation, my father thought education was the passport to economic freedom for us. He refused for us to be a contractor like him and forced us to study. In university, he forbade me to get involved in politics. He went as far as to refuse me to study law so that I would not get involved in politics. I was forced to study a course I did not like because he wanted me to be a banker.

Needless to say, I made the same mistake when it came to my children. I told them too that the ‘passport to heaven’ was to study. But I refused to dictate what they should study but instead asked them to study what they liked. I ensured they got the best education. I also reminded everyone that they do not talk about politics on the dinner table.

My story is not uncommon; such is the struggle and saga common to thousands of Malaysian homes. We are cajoled by our parents to look at bread-and butter issues. We are told that politics are not for us. We are told that our ‘houses have no windows’, so mind your own business and close the door. We are told that if this country is not good enough, you must get a good education and emigrate.

The Chinese? We are told this is not our home. We have no home. We are the Jews of the East. When trouble starts, we ought to look the other way. If it gets worse, we emigrate. Money talks. So long we have money, some country will take us.

100 years of ignorance. Is it blissful?
No. It is tragic.

Tuesday, 25 August 2009


Aunty ain't much of a drinker. Uncle married me cause I don't drink - this way he can drink my share. He also needed to marry someone who can drive but can't drink.

But since I am happy tonite, I will 2 large cocktail glasses of herbal tea in celebration of the Voice of the People being heard in Permatang Pasir.

Yes. To me, it's the People who Counts. The Vox Populi.
Yes. I know PAS is an Islamic Party & I am not Muslim
And YES. Whether it's PAS or UMNO, so long as the People have spoken that's the really IMPORTANT thing.

(ok I am a bad liar. I am happy there's gonna be more check & balance. I'm also happy that some airheads are gonna have some air let outta their head. They won't be so pompous with the "this land is MY land" thingy)

More importantly - NO. No I do not believe that PAS is gonna Talibanise my life any time soon just cause they have won.

Ofcourse as in any religion or belief, some will always be more zealous than others in imposing their will on others. Let's hope THOSE airheads will also have some air taken outta them.

On religion. I will always chose to respect (& even follow) any religion whose followers live a life I would Wish to, and Want to Emulate.

And No sirree. Forcing someone to bend to your Will never works. Not for a Child. Not for a Wife. Not even for my goldfish in his bowl.

Now. I will go back to my herbal tea & another toast to my Country's Health!
p/s it's also Bae Yong Jung (my cutie korean boy)'s birthday so I may well be doing some pole dancing in his honor tonite. It will be better if I had a pole & bae was around but .. hey! Beggars can't be choosers, so his photo in front of me will do.

Don't Call me tonite please.

Saturday, 22 August 2009

Life of a Grand Family

I dunno if you are like Aunty but I do a lotta wondering.
Take food for an example.

These days eating anything you desire everyday is no biggie.

When I was young, having prawns, sea cucumber, a whole big fish, AND a WHOLE chicken (as 1 dish) for new year & festival days is THE biggie.

A roast duck drumstick was my granny's gift to every grandkid's birthday & that was what I used to look forward to. MY OWN ROAST DUCK DRUMSTICK. (You can eat my shorts David!!!)

And if you were "well to do" ie you get to eat chicken once a week, your mother would have parted the 1kg chicken 4-ways to get 4 dishes out of it. For a family of 6, WITH leftovers for another meal or 2. Food never ever tasted that good!

Now - in the world according to Aunty - that middle class people like us can afford to eat anything we want anytime, what does one prepare for New Year?

And if the middle class have that "dilemna", what more the super rich? I have always wanted to know that. Yes.I am that keh poh.

And Homes. Having driven past some huge clonking mansions today; those with more garage doors than our home have room doors, Uncle & I are permanently curious what people do in these mansions.

Do they hold balls? Is there an indoor pool with spa? Does 6 maids work in them? How do they clean those windows from the roof down? (my question). What do they eat for dinner? (again you know whose question lah!)

Which is what brings me to the point (FINALLY).

Today I am excited to participate in a talk given by a descendant from one of those fabled old families who helped to develop KL & have roads named after them. The gracious lady from one of these families has agreed to talk about what life was like for the super rich nearly 80 years ago.
No I am not hoping to get stock tips from her or learn how her fore fathers got rich. I am just wondering how I can get my name on any lane in the country is all.

btw- that photo is supposedly that of the late Zakaria Deros' home in Klang
Enjoy your weekend!

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

Aunty Bites the Papers back

For the past month, I had been wanting to blog about all the funny thought bubbles floating above my head whenever I read what PIPs (people in power) say & do. Sometimes it is the journos, sometimes it is the papers' "policy", sometimes it is just what the PIPs say & do that really Sllll...aaayys me!

So today as a treat to all youse lovely blog readers, I thought I will share my tb*s with you. (*thot bubbles). Before we proceed any further, please take whatever I blog with more than your usual grain of salt - seeing that I AM - after all only an Aunty.

Here goes
1. Race-free Form. VERY SOON. You & I will no longer need to fill in our "race" on any official forms soon.

TB: That wouldn't be news anywhere else in the world but here cause there ain't nobody asking for that sorta info anywhere else but here.

OK stop being cynical. Yes. That would be ONE reconciliatory step to 1Malaysia. But that does not YET mean we are 1Malaysian.

It would take a WHOLE lot more Bruder!

2. This one...dunno how it got past the Religious Police.
Wrath of a spurned wife who threw acid on her policeman ex-husband caught errr..."upstairs" with his girlfriend.

TB: I thought that was considered khalwat? ie being in close proximity with a woman not his wife or member of family. That fella either brave to admit that or stupid! Maybe in JB the khalwat police not very strong lah!
I feel strongly that those who a few years back caught that American man with his wife in their hotel room in Langkawi should be seconded down to do what the JB religious police are not doing.

3. Whatever Opposition do or say is Stupid, Illogical, Irrational. Whatever BN says & do, sure logical, clever & rational.

Words associated with the Opposition or Pakatan - Antagonize,disparaging, inept, provoking
Words associated with BN - Guiding, Sound, Right direction

TB: AIYOH! Where got like that one? This type of "angkat*" politics is way WAY too obvious ain't it? Or we are saying only stupid ppl supports the Opposition & all the clever ones went to BN meh? Can not be right?

Maybe this is why people seek ALTERNATIVE news lah. Can't be everything opposition do is wrong, everything government do is right, RIGHT?

*angkat means "to carry" or "carry big leg" or sucking up, shoes polishing for all you foreign ignoramus!

Aiyah. I am only up to page 3 & Haven't even laid into the Teoh Beng Hock suicide article yet.

When I read the report/trial, I almost gave back up my oat porridge from breakfast to the papers.

How is it possible he was squating on the ledge before he jumped (which is why his sole was badly scuffed)?

Have you seen that only-can-open-out-from-the-bottom window? How did the fehla squat on the ledge outside that sorta window hah? Myself must learn that trick of reaching beyond such a window. Because I have the same kind of windows & I still can't clean them damn windows from the outside.

But I ask this. How come ONLY ONE side of his soles got totally scuffed OFF? From squating on a window ledge & then jumping? Hmmmm....

Ok. See? That's why I said I am a Aunty. I sure believe everything I read.

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

Which is why we no speakee Engrish

I posted this as a request from a concern parent & patriot.
I also posted this because I agree with it.
AND because I wanted to show you there are people like Melody who's a patriot AND not afraid to say it!

But she not so smart. She thought this letter to The Star will get published. NOT!

Which reminds me. Is not learning English beneficial? I think it is. This way we can continue to say "Tak faham lah" when we are caught in foreign countries without declaring bags full of moolahs?

OK..leelian & melody! This one's on me!

Melody writes:
"As a concern parent and an English teacher myself, I have been following this matter of the reversal of the teaching of Science and Mathematics in English to Malay with anxiety and disappointment.

Prior to this decision when the Prime Minister was still saying that they will study all concerns seriously before making a decision, I was very confident that our wise leaders and authorities will make the obvious decision to continue in the usage of English in these subjects as it is indeed the way to ensure our country's continual development and success for our future generation.

I know that the Government has made its decision.
I believe that the decision was made considering all parties involved. However in their implementation, I do believe that the Government could give consideration to special schools to continue in the teaching of Science and Mathematics in English. Do let the rakyat choose, let the parents and educators choose which medium would be best for the students and country.

So many people have written in, more so for English as there are so many clear cut and tangible benefits and advantage to our country and our people. Let’s not hide behind the fact that we need to strengthen Bahasa Malaysia and all the patriotic reasons for it. Yes Bahasa is the National Language and will always be the language that unite all races in this 1Malaysia concept.

There’s no threat at all to the importance of Bahasa. It doesn’t mean that we’re less patriotic or not keen about Bahasa Malaysia when we want to continue in the PPSMI..

In New Strait Times Aug 9 paper, ‘It was a matter of survival’ Deputy Prime Minister Tan Sri Muhyiddin Yassin acknowledged that the move to abandon
the policy of teaching Science and Mathematics in English (PPSMI) had been an ‘unpopular’ one.

Yes, it is an unpopular one for most parents with school going children and patriotic Malaysians who have a love and concern for the country. Economist, politicians, Industrialist and educators who want to see development, progress and success for the country know that this is really several steps backwards for Malaysia when we abandon PPSMI.

To quote the Deputy Minister further,he says the government had to pull the plug on the policy because it would have failed millions of Malaysian pupils.

The irony of this statement is that if PPSMI is not carried out, the government would have stifled and failed millions of abled Malaysian students who otherwise would have been instrumental in bringing development and being in the forefront of the world and the pride of Malaysia but for their lack of the English Language Skill.

Rural students are disadvantaged with PPSMI but it doesn’t mean the whole cohort of students have to abandon PPSMI so that we will all be backward in terms of the language. Rural students need more concerted help in English, that is the Education Ministry should send more trained English teachers and use special computer assisted English programs for them as advised by Dr Mahathir.

Six years is not sufficient time enough and commitment to see the PPSMI program through. Now we expect thousands of students caught in between to make the switch. Then again, for the final product, imagine having to do Science and Mathematics in Malay all throughout your primary and secondary education and then having to do a complete switch to English in the tertiary level. How bewildering it would be and our students could never compete internationally as this is the lingua franca of the world.

Malaysia would stand to lose if we allow a whole new generation of our young people to come up weak in English especially in Science and Mathematics. Every aspect of our economic life will be affected. Tourism a very competitive industry will be a sham if our people can’t even communicate with our guest visitors let alone sell our country convincingly. We are already losing out to our neighbours as many of these international tourist bypass Malaysia to go to Thailand or Singapore.

Then again, our government wants to establish Malaysia as an education centre or hub. How will it be possible for us to attract international students to do professional courses of study here in English if we ourselves are not producing a crop of Malaysians academics proficient and competent in the language to teach and converse in. We have an edge above our neighbours like Singapore and Thailand in terms of cost of living and could easily attract a large pool of international students as seen in our private tertiary institutions today. What will all this amount to if we abandon PPSMI?

I must say that I have the utmost regards for our former Prime Minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad who has the foresight to see this PPSMI through. In order for our country to attract multinational corporation investments and build on our multimedia super corridor etc we have to have a nation of people proficient and able to communicate effectively and competently in this language.

We are ahead of our Asean neighbours as our people are better proficient in English due to the British Legacy and heritage. Today, even China, Thailand and other countries are aware of this and thus are fast catching up, brushing up in English, knowing that this is the language of commerce and development. Students of these countries are clamouring to learn English, knowing that they are disadvantaged.

Today when we send our JPA scholars or students overseas for further studies, where is their standing in the world stage? Are they cowering in inferiority because of their language handicap in English just like the Thais, Indonesians or Chinese from China or are they the pride of our Nation in that they are on level playing ground with others, being competent and proficient in the language? Are they publishing paper in their field of study in Bahasa or English? World recognition only comes when it is published in the language of Science and technology that is English.

I am thankful that the Government apologized to the PTA (Parent –Teacher Association) which wanted to convene to discuss this matter and is listening to the voice of the rakyat.

There are still many concern parents and teachers who wanted to retain the policy or at least have a choice of the language medium of their children’s school. Let’s make it a win win situation by allowing the choice of special schools for different needs. In allowing this route, we ensure our survival in the world and yet cater to specific needs of our country. I’m just one of the thousands of parents.


Sunday, 16 August 2009

The New or Old Malaysian ?

My conscience pricked at me. It's not a large conscience so please forgive me when the pricking doesn't even stir a hair in my ear.

But I DO heed the call for a New Malaysian..which to me.. is really.. the Old Malaysian. It's just that politicians made so much noise that I got fed-up & tired.

But I have NEVER felt more (or less) Malaysian in all my life.
To many of us, being Malaysian was never about forsaking our Country, our personal Faiths, our cacophony of lingua Malaysian, or our Colour. To us Real Malaysians, our differences & similarities is a cause for Celebration. Not Deflation.

A long long time ago, I became more aware of the difference between my color, & someone else's when my All-distinction A-levels scoring friend, Teresa from TAR did not get a scholarship to get into university in Malaysia.
There were many not-so-rich in TAR but her family stood out as one of the poorest. Her 6 siblings all slept & lived in a living room no bigger than a walk-in closet in 1 of the old Sg Besi flats. But she never mourned or groaned about this.

Later when I went abroad to study in the late '70's. I was also made aware that even foreigners had misconceptions of Malaysians, when I was asked how come I am Chinese looking but said I was Malaysian?

I made my own Kebaya & went to give talks to groups of curious people in my host country, so that they can see & hear about Malaysia & her rich culture. I wasn't paid to do this. I LOVED to do this so that more can learn about Malaysia.

I was also frequently asked, why I had to earn my own way through college, eating 1 tukey to last a week (cheapest meat available then) for nearly 2 years to support myself when the Malaysian Government is so rich sending thousand upon thousands of students with full scholarship to the country I was in but I (who eventually graduated as a distinguished student from my year of 5000 graduates) received absolutely no support.
What was I supposed to tell anyone? That the color of my skin was the reason? Was I bitter then?
To me, no matter what. I was Malaysian & I didn't want to rock the boat. I took it all in stride that life was not fair & took it that I was indeed 2rd class citizen even though I was ALWAYS a full fledged Malaysian.

NOW I am bitter.

I have never sold my country out.
I have never taken a cent from taxpayers' money to enrich myself.
I have never used Racism as the platform on which to gain power.
I have always had good friends from many faiths.
I have family members who are Bumiputras.
I have always supported the underdogs; never once considering that I myself, am in a way, also an underdog.

And I am not alone in this.
Hundreds of thousands & even millions like me made our voices heard at the last Election to say "There MUST be change & Accountability to the Citizens & that WE ARE ONE VOICE"

So why give up now? Let's not give our conscience a rest nor be so tired of idiots in the Opposition that we give up.
Let's continue reminding racsists out there that we ARE Anak Bangsa Malaysia.

As for Teresa, the one with All As for her A-levels? She went to NZ with NZ$100 in her pocket, & a big dream in her heart that she will make it. She struggled like hell but because she was so brilliant & hard working, she was given a scholarship & a job as a Psychiatrist. Today she is a leading Psychiatrist there. And no longer a Malaysian.

H1N1- many are now immune?

Have you suffered from a particularly bad flu in the past 6 months?
Yes 6 months. That's my Aunty-finger-in-the-wind guess that the H1N1 pandemic didn't start only when it was "officially declared" 3 mths ago.

A good few months before the announcement of the H1N1 discovery, plenty must have already gotten the illness. Nobody gave that flu a name was the reason it was not "discovered" earlier.

And you know us lah. Hardy Asians. Just a flu. blah, blah,blah. Life goes on. Still must plant padi, feed the chickens, wash clothes in the river, burb the baby etc.

I for one, think I kena-ed this virus months before the announcement. In April, I was so ill with the flu that I kept asking Uncle every nite if I should be taken to hospital feeling I was lying at death's door.

This is when I discovered that he is set on my total destruction & wants to be a (relatively) young widower. Yes. It takes a major illness to know this. Uncle just reached across to me tenderly & said "Did you know the Spanish flu killed 20 million people after the 1st World War?"

What sort of German comfort is that? Which is why I survived. Just to teach him a lesson. I will only leave him a widower over my dead body.

But it was still strange to see a fever which hovered close to 39 degrees C every bloody night for a whole week. In the morning I was fine. Just gets progressively worse as the day goes by. By late afternoon, I'll be in my blanket, looking longingly at the Paracetamol like it's cocaine. I even had to replenish my 5 yrs old supply of Panadol. The Pharmacy made a million dollars from me before I went to see the doctor.

I am exactly like my mother. It's in the genes. We are so anti drugs & so anti doctors that if there were more people like us, doctors & drug dealers would be better off selling Nasi Lemak.

Even had the runs & lost a whole kg in a week - despite eating. I wasn't the only one. When I went to the neighbourhood clinic, the doctor was quite ho-hum about it. Seems like she's already seen a gazillion like me with the same symptoms. What does she know? SHE's just a young punk!

So you see what I am saying? I betcha MANY already have some immunity fr H1N1 because unbeknownst to us all, we have already gotten this flu many months before the Health Authorities took it seriously.

And if you have a husband like me, don't die huh? I was SOOOOO hoping he'll get my flu so that I can whisper the same loving tender words to him as he lays on death's door.

Friday, 14 August 2009

Five Stones Project SS2 by SDP

I have been searching & searching for the Perfect Place in which to rest my not-too-young bones in a coupla years from now. I believe in Kiasu-ism to the max when it comes to Properties. Cheap & Great. Not just good. GREAT.

In a perfect world, Unc woulda preferred 4000 sft on 1 level, preferably in the Hills facing the ocean. That or Federal Hills - until he heard the price people wanted for a unit of 2,500 sft.

Or Kuantan. Or Langkaw. For Rgt80 per sft. Yes. Pigs are flying even as we speak. Where got such property? On a hill facing the ocean. You think we are in Africa ah?

However, today I conned him to go to yet another project. This time, the Five Stones Condo Project in SS2, PJ.

At first he wasn't overwhelmed. After 20 minutes of looking at the Project, he wanted the Penthouse. Nyet by Aunty. I really don't want a duplex because I don't want to climb any stairs when I am 101yrs old. Or face the same situation we are now in, i.e. too large a space over 2 levels for 2 puny humans. I want to downsize not samesize my life.

I must say that the 1st day of the official launch today, when we arrived at 10-30am, we saw many people who were in a feeding frenzy.

Who were left with the poorer picks of the villa lots. There were only 5 lots out of 30 of these 2,300 to 4000 sft lots in the low-rise 13 storey block.

The low rise 4 storey garden villas where every unit has a garden (SUCKERS!) were sold out. Thank you very much. I ain't gonna git a garden unit. No more agonizing over why snails & weeds are multiplying faster than the heliconias.

Naturally all the units facing an "extensive" garden were already sold in the soft launch.

I dunno why only the rich & datuks get the best if they aren't rich enough. People like us who are GENUINELY goin' to live in these projects gets screwed all the time! Anyhoos. What to do?

There were plenty in the 2 Tower Blocks (25 & 37 storeys?) selling at about Rgt890,000 for 1800sft were left.

Unc & I focussed on the "villa" units. He's a big boy. He likes space. I turned my back to drag Unc to look at the remaining "villa" units & BOOM! Lot 7th storey gone!

ALAMAK! Only 1st,3rd,5th floors left - on the UNPREFERRED Side! But still. North facing in front, away from the exhaust fumes of the car park, & South in the Kitchen - facing Jasmine Towers car park...but on top of that is a tennis court, not SOOOO bad. For >1 million rgt? Maybe NOT?

But the others who bought at the soft launch can't be so stupid, right?

Now. I have looked at so many projects that I have a check list of what we wanted. Now to check it against Five Stones Project.

Location, location, location! SS2 PJ. Freehold in SS2 where everything's a house.
Greenery - Check! Sorta. 1/2 acre with Angsana trees! I like Angsanas!!!
In the middle of all the conveniences esp Great FOOD - Check!
Not far from our Club - Check!
Peaceful - Check! (we think lah)
Biggish Balcony - Check!
Lift opening out only to our Unit - Check! (That one bonus check!!)
2 units per floor - Check!
3 car park lots. NOT that we have 3 cars but just in case? - Check!
Connected to major highways - Check!
Sound Developer? SDP mah! - Check!

Lots of Space? - Check! low-ish density ie eventual 400 units over 4.9 acres but to Unc low density is like 1 to an acre & for that kinda space, he'd better move to Siberia.

SOLID building - DUNNO. Every building seems to be built out of 1 layer of brick & some slaps of mortar; so who are we to be exceptional here?

Now. Where did I lay that extra million or 5 so that I can get my own little green dot!

Thursday, 13 August 2009

(S)Low Lifes

(S)Low life 1: I am trying to lie low. But turns out I am too busy to even lie low. None of your business but yes! All this relaxing & retirement shit is a lie. I thought I would have too much time on my hands when I become a full time kept woman.

SO WRONG! I hardly have time to dye my hair & do dindins. Everyday I fall into my TV chair exhausted.

Low Lifes 2: I received 2 ranting racist mails & I trashed them without even scrolling down. No time for morons or idiots.

Low Lifes 3
Inquest into Teoh's death.

I still can't understand why a man like Teoh who's about to marry the next day would wanna kill himself. Or why the Anti Coruption investigation would question him from evening to early morning. After all he's not the suspect. He is just how come he was questioned for 8 hours?

Was he gonna skip town? Was he gonna burn the records & crash the PC? Were they trying to protect him while he was trying to protect another?

Then "funnier" still (if you find this sorta thing "funny").

Seems like the investigating officer had NOTHING written in his little questioning book. Granted the police took the little black book from the MACC chaps 2 days after Teoh's death. But nothing in the book is a little too suspicious no? Heck! My 91 yr old Mum has more written into her "555" notebook!

Low Lifes 4
Aunty pops into town now & then. I take a short cut into the PWTC due to some irresistible food from one of the warungs.

Since people are accusing Uncle Zorro of being paid by Pakatan, then I wanna tell you I keep seeing bloggers there (in shirt & tie) who are supposedly NOT working there, & who constantly protest they are objective.
What conclusions am I supposed to draw from that hah? And we all know the type of conclusions I can draw, no?
Do I believe Zorro's being paid by Pakatan? He sure oughta replace his old clunker if he was. Or at least buy me a nice cushion like the one Chihaha has in this photo.

Sunday, 9 August 2009

Walking? = Demo? = Riot Control? & There aint no pleasin' some Neighbours!

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Go on & throw whatever brickbats you like. Today Aunty is active in her left brain so I am gonna gitsomethingsoffamychest. And Y'all know my policy on MY blog. I just delete comments at will. Yeah.
So here goes.

Topic 1 - Walking? = Demo? = Riot Control?
Many righteous Msians have come out to write about what an f**king inconvenience the jam protesters had caused last Saturday. Lotsa Moolahs were lost by "idiots" Just that I ain't too sure who the idiots are.

Take the 1 & only upclose&personal of a protest I witnessed.
Last year while smack in the middle of Berlin's busiest road, The Kur'dam at 9am on a Monday I heard whistles & shouting through my supposedly double glazed hotel windows. Saw a few hundred flag waving people. Got excited. Whipped out the camera. Maybe it's a Riot???

Hmmm..somethin' wrong here folks. There were only a few measly isolated police on bikes escorting them protesters. Hundreds of them protesters & maybe 5 police? Them protesters waved flags with signs in German reading "Justice & Fairness to the Workers of xxx"
Uncle hardly roused himself from bed for this. He told me these protesters are from a union. (And if you know Germany, they have more unions than there are ants on a rambutan tree)

Everyone looked relaxed. Even jovial. And I mean, including the Police. Took the few hundred people like 20 minutes strolling past our hotel till they were out of sight. NO Baton in sight. No water canon. No one in riot gear. I have seen more "action" at the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade in NYC.

Seems such walks by the hundreds are the norm, & the job of enforcement is to provide guidance to walkers to walk in a certain direction (I guess as pre-agreed), & also to guide traffic away from the walkers. Sorry lah I gawked in open mouthed astonishment.

My mother was right. Westerners are way too liberal!

Topic 2: There ain't no pleasing the Neighbours
Guarded communities seems to be de riguer if one doesn't want to have their head bashed in by intruders or their handbags snatched in front of their homes. There is NO safe neighbourhood in ALL of of Malaysia. HECK! Even Kuantan or KT's or Kijal have their share of high crime rates!

Achah! Dun ask me what the heck the Polis is doin', k? I feel our finest have already worked more then their fair share last Friday & Saturday in KL.

So back to guarded community & guards. I dunno too much about guarded (gated?) communities cause I don't live in one. I have been told I am the only unlucky one with the record number of break-ins during the past 3 years here.
That is, other than the ho-hum usual snatch thefts or 3 or 5, the usual 2 or 5 windscreens bashed in, the even more ho-hum annual clean-up of a house or 2 by burglars & that one or 2 times someone was nearly snatched into a car.
So in other words, in my community, we ain't at that danger point yet. Unless someone gets slashed or murdered. We can afford to wait somemore here.

But it would also appear that not everyone is THAT concerned about their neighbour's homes being broken into, or that their neighbours are being bashed in. "Not me mah!"

Because if people were at all concerned, they sure show it in strange ways. I can hardly believe it when I read letters & articles recently from people complaining that their "freedom" are being taken away in their gated neighbourhood.

Yes. You didn't pay, so you don't get a sticker & that's resulting in the guards stopping to ask you to stop each time you use the road. It's their job to stop anyone for the safety of all concerned.

Yes. You didn't pay, but don't you feel better & safer now that you can actually walk around your neighbourhood without fear of your head being bashed in?
Yes. You didn't want the security because your house has never been broken into in the last 40 years you've lived there.

But haven't you heard that thieves don't care who they slash or steal from? You mean you can guarantee that nobody will ever invade your home just cause it looks like a dump? What? You don't care that there may be a real & present danger to the females, the young & the very old in your household?

Methinks some resentment may come from real "prudent" people.

They resent that old homes are sold to newbies who redo the houses making them fancy & thereby "attracting" robbers - "So whose fault is it hah?"

But look at it this way Mr(s) "Prudent". The rejuvenation of your neighbourhood just means that ulitmately the value of your property goes up - thanks to newbies showing others the "potential" in doing up an old home.

Funny how everyone wants the price of their asset to be unrealistically high when they sell, & yet expect that the price of another asset they wanna buy to be even more unrealistically low

Funny how people are selfish. I had someone tell me that's why they never will renovate their leakin', fallin', crackin' home. This way nobody knows they are well off. WELL! Whaddaya say to THAT?

Friday, 7 August 2009

WTF is this Guy?

Women of a certain vintage are always more prudent than young grapes still fresh on the vine. We are also more immune from deceptions & false compliments. At least I'd like to think so.

Yesterday I received a mail from this guy in my facebook. Wanting to know me SERIOUSLY. Because? I dunno this chap. I suspect he's fishing for lonely females. However I did state I am married in my profile. No wonder some women fall prey. He is handsome. But like I tell Uncle, this guy's the age of my son; IF I had any.

Little does "Lance" know that compliments are worth dittly-s**t to women in my age group. We know better than to think we are "beautiful" if some stranger said that. Heck! He would do better to write "You look mature" & I'd be more likely to believe him.

Anyhoos Ladies. Watch out for this "Lance Ortega". He smells, looks & feels like a scam artist.

Saturday, 1 August 2009

Makes me wanna go back to bed

Yeah. It's that type of week for the past few weeks for me.
I was "whole" again & has bounced out of bed every morning. Until I did some reading & that makes me wanna crawl right back under my pillows.

Seems like we Malaysians are "World Class" in everything we do & that includes Bashing ppl up. Even the dead ones.

*For all youse non-world class foreigners obviously not M'sians; Boleh=OK

Just 3 Fine Examples of our World Class-ness are below
1. We're WC in Bashing 'em up no matter who you are!

Take the example of this "Datuk"* who had his Bodyguards Bash Up a British Diplomat for taking up the Diplomat's car park in a lux condo

*An honorific awarded to individuals who's done great service to our Boleh-ness. Some famous Datuks include that handsome famous Bollywood Actor Shah Rukh Khan who made a movie here, Jean Todt ex-head of Ferrari racing who's paid to be a Bolehland Ambassador - in his spare time (I want that job!!), & a great other many assortment of Bizmen & a sprinkling of Crime Lords, War Lords, & Ohmylords

2. We're WC in Turning Peaceful Protest into city siege
(I can't say "bashed up" cause I have no proof but I hear some ppl have been walking into doors on the streets today).

Today's supposedly peaceful protest was turned into a siege. I sure hope those of us who tried to participate will learn that so long as the PeeEm says "No", he means NO, & so youse lot'd better listen! Does it matter thousands & thousands still tried to turn up? WHO CARES?

Our government is Great & continues to be Great & if you dun like it, you know what you can do at the next elections, right?

3. We're WC in Bashing Dead People
Yasmin Ahmad, a much beloved Female Director controversial for her "truth or dare" stories & haunting commercials passes away. And so how do we "honor" her passing?

Yeah. You're gettin' smart! We World Class Bashed Her!

The popular (sick) Kosmo mag "exposed" her as a Sex Change person the day after her burial. Is it true? Is the moon made of cheese?

Yeap. I sure learnt somethin' this week. We sure love to bash 'em - & it ain't matter shit if they're dead or down. We bash 'em all the Same!