Saturday, 15 May 2010

Why I want to be Queen

Dang! I have been busier than a squirrel hoarding nuts for the winter!

Come to think of it, I have been so preoccupied, my eye brows have grown bushier than the tail of a squirrel.

This morn when I looked into the mirror I thought "Hey! I know that person. Ain't that the nice Sikh man who did the Big, Strong & Friendly commercial for Standard Chartered?"

That damn squirrel woulda been envious of my tail. Except it's on my face.

Why the busy-ness? Aunty's been substituting for our neigbourhood "penghulu" as he's laid low for now

And we needed to do an urgent project for "Homeland Security". Nah. Not the Neighbourhood RT (rukun tetangga) Patrol.

More like how to give residents our rights back & at the same time improve Neighbourhood Watch in our family dominated area.

If you see a tired Aunty holding an umbrella with a green bag going door to door? It's me. Don't just pass me by. Pass me an ice lolly & then pass me by please.

But truly. Everything happens for a reason. And it also happens to help us learn lessons in life.

And so, I have to thank this thankless work for intro-ing me to the Good, the Bad & (MAN!) the REALLY ugly!

The Good. Some of the nicest people (title, brains etc) were also the humblest. They even asked politely if they should put their (rightfully earned) title on the petition to further the cause.

And extra brownie points for offering me a glass of water. And a seat. Out of the heat. Heck! For even allowing me to step into their garden is a great thing!

The Bad. Not as teruk as the Ugly but bad enuf. They tell me "After everyone sign then I sign".
"Do you want to sign?"
"OH YES! We should stand united on this. BUT I don't want people to know it's me"
Or "I know its a good thing but if everyone signs then you don't need me, right?"

"But I am standing here now (in the heat feasted on by mossies if I may add), so please sign if you want to so I don't have to come back?"

"Never mind. Just come back. And by the way. Next time can you also make sure the garbage truck don't throw my bin around?"

The Ugly. If you thought the bad were unreasonable & demanding, then the Ugly takes the cake.

Asking (& explaining) for support was like asking them to pay me to take their 1st born away.

My stance is simple. Want? Sign. Thank you.
Don't want? Thank you. You have every right to do as you please.

But when the ugly accuses me of being "unhumanistic, uncharitable & unkind to the downtrodden" - as if they are paying me to abuse me - that really gets to me.

You know this Aunty lah. I am a free thinker. I don't believe good works need come only from one's religious conviction. Good works can come just about from anyone so long as the heart's in the right place.

You see. This here case is a "delicate" case of our mini Homeland Security in the neighbourhood. & we aren't even talking of a guarded community.

It's about showing the boot to an unwelcome "community" project someone plonked down on us. They mean well. A good thing in the wrong place.

All this family residential community could see was a community service which in no way benefits us. Not even an iota.

And people were pianopiano about it too. By operating behind closed gates & giving it an innocuous title such as "church/temple work".

For years. Until it grew so big, it expanded. Then the S hit the proverbial fan.

Yes. You are right. My own hypocrisy took a big time bite back at the bitch. Like doing voluntary work in a deprived place then going back to my own little serene & safe home where I don't have to see anything. At my own time. In someone's else backyard.

But this is not Africa Dorothy.

This is Malaysia. So I don't get it how none of us were given a chance to object before the permits were granted by the relevant authorities.

Even as we blissfully went about our lives asking "Eh. Why is the security here declining ah?" resulting in the furious fortification of our homes...and NOW we know!

I so totally disagree that anyone should lose out on (an already fragile) peace of mind in a busy city.

Let alone be stripped of the right to say "aye" or "nay"
Which is why I have been doing this.

I have now new found respect for rights activists & politicians who goes campaigning.

Because 1 critical thing this whole fiasco's made me realilze. Unless they made me Queen unconditionally, this Aunty's NEVER going to campaign no more!

Sunday, 2 May 2010

Spare the Rod?

Right off the bat. Let me assure you I am not a modern parent.

I strongly feel that parents who give their kids the liberty to decide, who don't supervise their kids & let them roam the nights are not modern. They are stupid.

Leaving the police & maids & teachers or for the law to be enacted to protect kids for them are just stupid parents.

What? Your kid's just too naughty? & you can't control him/her? They climb out of the window to go out?
Install alarms. When the alarm triggers the window grill, you know yr kid's escaping.

And if you are working, you should try applying yr modern mgmt discipline at home too. Tell yr kids what's considered a bad behaviour.

Warn them. Give 3 warnings. After that, they face the music. No Tv. No Net. No Phone, money or Games. Just Books. A spanking now & then reinforces the good behaviour. Or the threat of a spanking is just as good.

I think these days we take modern parenting in a silly & not sensible way. Allowing total freedom & choice to undisciplined kids is like allowing a monkey to go shopping at a supermarket.

Modern parents seems to think spanking & punishing kids shows ppl they are being violent (& therefore non modern). They feel kids should be able to express themselves, so they allow kids to talk back to them.
Talking back is disrespectful. Discussing is intellectual. Got it?
And Screw those ppl who thinks spanking is not being modern.

They are the same ones who don't ask their kids to account for their time & money or where they suddenly get expensive new stuff. And then wonder why their kids get into trouble one day.

I don't get it. How can the modern parent who, having read so much & being much more educated than our forefathers be this dumb at child rearing?

And have you never heard parents asking their 3 yr olds what they want to eat & drink at restaurants? If kids are so smart about nutrition, they don't need adults.

And when they are home, & kids don't eat the other stuff you put before their face without being asked, then why be pissed off?

I may not like the non democratic ways my parents behaved towards me but I appreciated the discipline it brought to me.

Ya. I got asked what I wanted to eat & drink. But ONLY on my birthday. Once a year & don't you forget that.
Ya. I wanted to go dating when I was 16 but I wasn't allowed. Ya. I also wanted to go on a motorbike with this "wild" 17 yr old but I dare not even bring that subject up.

Bored? Without internet, handphone, nintendo or cable TV? We weren't so stupid to mourn to our parents when we were bored.

If you are Sooo...oooo bored ..."Go Study". Or Read. Or Play with yr games. Or play with yr neighbours.

Ahh? Did you say our neighbourhood's much safer than today & friends used to live close by.

Not always. There were still cars & lots of vicious stray dogs too. Perverts also existed as in time immemorial they did. A guy flashed me once. But I knew he was sick & I could run.

And our best friends from school didn't always lived close by.

So our neighbours (from other schools) became our best playmates.
No Hong Guan biscuit tasted so good nor F&N cordial so delicious as the ones we shared with our friends from the hood.

Even though boys were allowed to play on our streets or a nearby field, they were always within eye / ear shot. Our parents & other neighbours were always, all seeing & all hearing. No sounds of the TV or a handphone to distract them.

You got into a fight? Whop! Everyone got their ears tweaked. Regardless who started it. From that one parent who caught them.

But nowadays, parents are way too concerned about others bothering with their kids. As they do not bother with other ppl's kids.

Or they are too busy with their own lives & activities with their right to "relax/time out". Once a week. Hanging out with friends after work. Golf, Facials, & gym weekends. Who's checking their kids' homework? The tutor.

Hello? You want time out? Be childless. Don't bring a kid into the world & make them feel they are intruding on Your Life.

Maybe I had a real boring childhood & boring parents. But I am thankful for parents who didn't ignore their kids & who didn't routinely put the TV on as nanny.

If you want to be modern, then brace yourself for the consequences. And don't blame anyone else but yourself for your "modernity" when your kids go AWOL or who steals because they think morality is uncool.